Lesbians and Straight Dude and Chick Questions
Wow. My last post got me a lot of questions, all from straight men and women. Those who know me personally called me, texted me, emailed me at work. Those who don’t personally know me, Twittered me, left me comments on my blog, and emailed me at my sterk address.
The two most often asked questions. What is a “tongue-up” and “dental dam…huh?”
Tongue-ups, you know, like push ups, exercises to keep that ever important muscle strong and healthy so you can use it to its best advantage at a moment’s notice. Men, you need to be doing tongue-ups as well as lesbians. Make those women in your lives proud (and squirmy).
And dental dams. Ah. Maybe some of the younger lesbos don’t remember when these were “essential”…the early days of AIDS. Dental dams are those latex square pieces that the dentist puts, or used to put, into your mouth and then would poke out the tooth he/she was working on. But lesbians used them for “safer sex” during oral sex, so as not to transmit bodily fluids. I hate the taste of latex.
My sister didn’t understand. She blamed it on a coworker not getting the definition. I told her “Female version of condom…stretch over area.”
She still didn’t get it. “Shut up, really? I’m still a little confused. Angela wants to know for what part of the body?” So I took ten seconds and drew her a picture in Word and sent it.
They are probably sold in sex shops now. But I remember actually asking my dentist for some, to give to a friend as a gag gift. He gave me some with a perplexed look on his face.
So with all of these questions, I have an idea for a lesbian related URL I have reserved, thought up by that hunky Mormon Mr. Ransom Note Typography himself. I should use it as a forum for straight people to ask all kinds of questions about lesbians. That would be kind of fun. And of course I would have to get a lot of input from other lesbians, because I am, after all, a little rusty.
Love the pic, hey is that woman giving you the thumbs up?!? Niiiiiiice!
Just an FYI - I work as an Athletic Trainer in a high school and our Sex ed teachers teach EVERYONE (Males and females) about Dental Dams no matter hetero or not. I remember thinking, once I got to college (and I’m straight), “a dental dam might prevent disease, but no way it feels as good”!
(Sorry J_Bradley if this was TMI for you! 
)
Firstly, JennVH: Wahoo! that your schools Sex Ed teachers cover dental dams for everyone. So impressive and definitely a step in the right direction.
Secondly: No, they don’t feel as good. A better solution is SaranWrap. Still damn sturdy, but much more…um…tactilly advantageous, can we say? It is available in colors, but not flavors, so there is that drawback.
Thirdly, and, I think, most important that it be addressed with immediacy - Sterkworks: I refer to your above drawing. Honey! I know you said you are rusty, but please. There are actually TWO (2) separate breasts on the human female. If you are currently under the impression that there is one, as pictured above, you need to do a couple things, and quickly! 1) You need a large mirror, so as to be able to see yourself and *know* what I say is true. 2) You must get out there and observe as many unclad human female specimens as possible, so as to never again forget.
(Love me now, kill me later.)
@JennVH Wow. I didn’t know that. I thought it was pretty much a thing of the past. And if I know J_Bradley like I think I know her, she would agree. Me too.
sorry, am having a hard time typing. “hunky” keeps spinning around in my head.
@Stormcarver Ha! Yes, but trying to draw a body in 10 seconds with that little pencil in Word is a challenge. And when I lay down, it doesn’t look like I have any boobs because they just fall over to the sides.
@ Sterkworks Point taken, re: Word. And, btw, my breastststs do the gravity slide too. *sigh* Read again, though. I didn’t say to put the mirror on the ceiling!
Jenn but do you ever recall “our” health teachers talking about dental dams, I don’t. However, maybe I was just too busy swooning over Ms. Rekow!?! It is good to know that the district to which I pay taxes talks to young people about dental dams in the safer sex teachings.
Sterk, Ms. Rekow was my gym teacher who confirmed any doubts I had that I my be gay. She was my high school fantasy. Possibly even still to this day.
I went to one of those sex toy parties once and they had dental dam things. Flavored ones.
cloherty ond
Your drawing is PRICELESS!
I can’t believe people don’t know what a dental dam is!